My daughter was off to college last week, as were many of her friends. When I cross paths with their parents or really just about anyone who knows she's starting college, the inevitable question is, "How are you doing? How much did you cry?"
My feed is full of "how the survive the college drop off" type articles (they are replacing the "top 22 things every dorm room needs" articles of last month.) I saw this one today - 50 steps - really?
I am partly exasperated and partly secretly worried that I am the worst mom ever - I didn't shed a tear taking her to school. Am I some kind of monster? Moms weeping as their children leave the nest is a perfectly reasonable response. I remember vividly a very tearful phone call with my own mom as I got ready to board my plane for my deployment to Iraq (I was 40 years old, and we both were puddles :-)).
Of course I miss her, of course my brain is overflowing with a zillion worries that range from all the dangers lurking out there in the real world to "is she happy?" She is a super independent girl, so much so for most of her senior year in high school we not-so-jokingly called her, "The Tenant." Thinking back, I was more sad summer before last, when she went on an extended overseas trip with the high school band and got her driver's license (I even wrote about it at the time, here). I realize now that her nest leaving started long before last week.
So no, I am not a puddle of tears right now. I suppose they are lurking out there somewhere. But I am also so dang excited to see her fly right out of our nest a bit further and see how she flies.